From Self-Care to We-Care
The New Science of Mindful Boundaries and Caring from an Undivided Heart
In From Self-Care to We-Care, psychologist Jordan Quaglia tackles the dilemma of whether to prioritize self-care or care for others, suggesting “we-care,” a holistic, science-based approach that includes both.
The book argues that neither a “self-first” nor an “others-first” approach to care can fulfill the human need for boundaries and belonging. Arguing that contemporary society is experiencing the effects of overemphasis on the “self-first” approach to well-being, with downsides including the fragmentation of families and communities, the book advocates for replacing the “either/or” (self vs. others) mindset to well-being with a more inclusive approach rooted in the wisdom of Indigenous cultures and ancient teachers. It treats individuals as parts of a larger whole.
The text makes important distinctions between terms, clarifying, for example, the difference between empathy and compassion by defining the former as “feeling with others” and the latter as “feeling for others” accompanied by motivation to help them. Further, it highlights the role of compassion in setting healthy boundaries, evoking joy with its affirmation that doing caring acts is “contagious,” spreading through communities for the well-being of the larger whole. “Pay it forward” actions that went viral are used as examples.
Marked by insight and a gentle, curious, multilayered approach to the questions it poses, the book invites investigating with deep critical thought and a compassionate heart. Brief stories embody its questions to help awaken the mind and heart to how a “we-care” approach can resolve conflict and foster personal and social healing. The book also suggests transformative practices, meditations, and activities to train, encourage, and facilitate growth in qualities like compassion and authenticity.
From Self-Care to We-Care is a science- and ancient wisdom–based guide to personal and social well-being through harmonizing self-care with caring for others.
Reviewed by
Kristine Morris
Disclosure: This article is not an endorsement, but a review. The publisher of this book provided free copies of the book to have their book reviewed by a professional reviewer. No fee was paid by the publisher for this review. Foreword Reviews only recommends books that we love. Foreword Magazine, Inc. is disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255.
